Inconsolable Paris Hilton

Paris Hilton may have ridden her personal philosophy of acting as stupidly as humanly possible in front of the maximum number of available cameras to unprecedented celebutard heights, but her recent probation violation for a DUI charge has posed her team with the kind of serious threat to their client's welfare that can not be easily brushed aside by right-hand flack Elliot Mintz's typical Jedi mind tricks.

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